Darkness or light? That is the choice, always. What we choose will be dependent on our attitude, our programming, our upbringing. There is always an opportunity for healing, wherever we shine our light. Sure, we will be hounded by the Darkside until we face it head on. That is our work. That is the only mission that really counts.
This Incantation is from The Eagles Gift, by Carlos Castaneda
“I am already given to the power that rules my fate,
and I cling to nothing, so I will have nothing to defend.
I have no thoughts, so I will see.
I fear nothing, so I will remember myself.
Detached and at ease, I will dart past the Eagle
to be free.”
You may need this when you embark upon your descent into the underworld!
May The Force Be With You….Always!
I felt in you, inside me perhaps now I look again
A black hole.
It matters little where it was located, it was there.
There is something you should know about this place but I hardly know where to begin.
There is something in there that I feel compelled to see
To touch, to taste, to experience.
I think it is the unknowable.
The place into which we must leap, trustingly
With our life in our hands,
abandoned to the fate that awaits us.
As I said.
And I said to you that I wanted this and that.
But did I really know what I was wanting?
Beyond the surface patina of how things look, how things appear to our mind?
Did I really look beyond that?
For once, I did not.
I did not enter that black hole
For I was sore afraid.
And so should we all be.
But never be afraid of that fear.
For without that instinct, we are done for.
Without that fear, our integrity does not last.
Without that primal relevance, we are ourselves, irrelevant.
How can we become relevant to the world, and to ourselves, without the burgeoning sense of self-importance?
By letting go;
Every moment, a small surrender.
Every moment, a peaceful intention and determination.
Every moment, finding love, where once there was emptiness.
And of emptiness?
Who can say?
Therein lies the essence of the ‘black hole’.
I told you.
It’s deep alright!
It’s all up for grabs.
Dorchester May 2nd 2017
For art see here
Now I can see what you are
What you are not
What I am
What I am not
I’m taking risks
To be close to you
Because I don’t always understand things
Unless I am close up
Snuffling around for clues
Like a mouse
I want to figure things out
There is nothing like
The love I feel
When it is flowing
A shape can be formed
And trap us in it’s hold
When we stop clinging and let ourselves feel
Exactly what we feel,
When we don’t lock anything down
And we can tell our truth
And be heard by one another
Then the riches will reveal themselves
In the experiences we share
For Art Go Here
Opening up to the places inside that have been shut away for so long.
Making faces at the fears that now uncover their subversive intentions to derail me from my truth.
I am not there yet;
The fears still serve as my protection.
Protection from what?
I wonder… if not the memories of past times when that massive energy overwhelmed me in it’s force and ferocity, taking me down into depths I never knew existed, into negativities so colossal that I was drowning….?
That was before.
That is the past.
The time is now; I recognise these things in their true form.
Thoughts that have become tram lines in my heart and head; my body merely responding to the vibrations being offered up from universal source; (some are bigger and better conduits than others), and for so long I was hearing the Voice in a solitary confinement of my own.
Pressure from without would keep me in my place, the place where other’s fears are not jarred or stirred, and when I broke free it was like all volcanoes erupting at once.
But that was then…
Now a memory.
This is now…
How is it now? Really?
Is it like a spring rain, for the first time warm again on the inside?
Is it like a water fountain of release, bubbling and flowing inside of your deepest parts?
Is it like a place so sublime that you can hardly hold it for the embarrassment of riches it now yields?
Is it like a formless being inhabiting your very body?
Are you empty yet?
If not, there is still time.
Wednesday 19th April 2017
Now I can see, what you mean is so much more to me than a cheap thrill. It’s a bitter pill to swallow when you know you’ve fallen into a trap and had to have your friends point out a few things about how you’ve been acting.
Suck it up.
They have your best interests at heart.
You just have to believe they love you.
Serious is freedom’s business…
Let go of the ego’s version of freedom
And return to the freedom within
Let serious then become playful
For the business of freedom
Can never be corralled in moroseness
But must be let to fly
For the gold must be found
In those who can and will
For the good of those who can’t
God bless them all
I like Apples because:
I seek nourishment; because I am wired to; They help me know myself…They are delicious, food, natures medicine, full of nutrients, sunlight and vital forces…
Because I am Eve.
It is my lot to love an Apple!
Because from the Dawn of Time
I have known Apples to be
the source of my existence
and this is my sin!
My confusion, my knowing
that blocks out the One Central Thing
that makes me cover myself in shame;
The thing is
that I forgot that
The Apple is NOT GOD;
but the fruit of knowing God in man!
But I must learn this lesson well;
for many years, have I been deluded
By God; that Father,
God, that Son,
and I… The Ghost!
the mere ghost…
I set myself to wandering
alone in the desert,
no mortal man to hold me;
Inviolable, untouchable in my torment.
I sought for the apple tree within
and found only you, you and
But you are NOT GOD
So how can I be SO mistaken?
So I know GOD through Apples
but do I know, can I know GOD
directly, by my own lights?
Can I come, finally, naked
open handed, surrendered
God, I looked for you everywhere
But I found only Apples!
They are sweet but they are not you,
and I am mere Mortal;
Wounded and seeking
This Apple would only feed me
for so long, but I seek
life eternal, life beyond life
I seek your Source now;
I no longer seek Apples.
They are what they are;
They appear, are eaten
or being eaten by other insects
and I feel abundant.
But there is only one
The Apple Tree itself belongs to You!
March 28th 2017
I wrote this after a long and painful night letting go my attachment to a friend. I love him dearly but it is not time for us to go beyond the simplicity of friendship. I accept this, though it hurts me greatly. I’m sure the pain is cleansing. Ouch. Healing HURTS!!!
Earlier in the day whilst we were hanging out he looked for a bag of apples and couldn’t find them. Later he told me he had found them after all. I said I wanted his apple! Ha! Anyway, we played with the metaphor of apples representing men… and he asked my why I loved apples so much?
I had to pause and really think about this one, (hence the title) and the depth I found was actually quite religious in it’s tone. Quite. I thought, yes! This love with attachment is what hurts. It would do me well to reconnect with my source energy and stop mooning over him like he would be all the answers to my emptiness. Maybe he would be for a while, but then, when I’ve eaten his flesh and sucked him dry… then what…?
Back to the apple tree…
I have to credit Carl Gustav Jung with the original quote which was as follows.
“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes”
I read it in a book and it stuck but I’ve paraphrased it because it is so spot on. How many times in daily life do we reach for the outside option to make ourselves feel better?
Anyway, please check out my video above and perhaps see you around a little.
Thanks for your visit.
Header photo artwork by:
To see my art:
I’ve always been a scaredy cat
how did I get over that?
I didn’t but I kind of did
but it got over me.
I wish I had your courage
your boldness and your flourish
but I was told to simmer down
to stop being wild!
And so I did!
I stayed quiet when I wanted to shout
so scared of not being liked by you
but therein lies the prison!
I set me free!
Photo artwork by:
For my paintings: